no, really, time flies

sooo after all this time i finally made an appointment with an orthodontist listed by cigna's website for next thursday! yaaay! the receptionist told me to have 200 dollars when i come to pay for the molds and xrays, which they'll do for 50% off if i do it the same day as the consultation. i'm excited, but a little nervous. i'm a bit upset with myself for taking so much time to finally get things started, but the problems i had with the last orthodontist really deterred me! my face is all i can think about lately. it might all just be in my head, but i feel like my jaw is getting worse! i feel as if just in the last year my upper teeth have receded more behind my lower teeth. they don't fit together at all anymore, and my jaw hurts all the time. it hurts the most when i yawn and try to hold my mouth closed with my teeth together. i'm ready for this to be fixed!! no more "hey, you look like jay leno!" :(

time flies!

sooo, lalala. i realize it's been awhile, I was really just pretty much hopeless after getting the run-around from so many people.

However...drum roll...

my work is switching dental insurance, and going with cigna now! so cigna will be my insurance for dental and medical, instead of just medical. there are many more orthodontists under cigna's policy than aetna's where I live, so hopefully this will make things a little easier! I really don't like the ortho I was going to.

hopefully i'll get the ball rolling again soon! :)

setback

sooo, after going to have x-rays done this morning, i received a call from the orthodontist's office. apparently i can't see the oral surgeon there because he "won't be the one performing the surgery" and the information i need to send to the insurance company is from my regular general practice doctor... i'm a little confused.

and i did a search on cigna's website for oral surgeons in the network...and apparently there are none. i'm not quite sure what to do next; the orthodontist's office hasn't been as helpful as i'd hoped.

x-rays and surgeon appts.

so two mondays later... :) :)

i went back to the orthodontist, Cigna insurance policy on "jaw surgery" in hand, to see what's next. the receptionist gave me a referral to go get x-rays on wednesday, and then set up an appointment to see the oral surgeon on friday. i'll ask him to write me a letter! fingers crossed... thanks for all the comments, everyone! they're very helpful and inspiring, even if i waited so long to get started.

options

so on monday i'm making the call to my insurance company to see what my options are. hopefully... i'll have some options. i feel a little better since last week's ortho visit. time to get to work!! :)

a little background

i've started this blog to track my progress.

since i was in sixth grade, i've been made fun of for my prominent, less-than-perfect lower jaw. i never really thought of it as a serious problem until i recently went in for my six month check-up with my dentist.

"wow, melissa, we need to get you to an orthodontist. unfortunately, your lower jaw has overdeveloped and you have a pretty bad crossbite. you'll probably need a combination of braces and surgery to fix this. oh, but you're a beautiful girl."

... What?? It's funny how i just now remember that little compliment he threw in there at the end of his speech. i suppose that's how it's been my whole life---i can only remember the "hey, jay leno"s and the "hey, chief chin"s and never the "oh my, you're so beautiful"s.

it's like i can feel my lower jaw down there, mocking me, showing itself off to the world. lately it's been hurting a lot too... it just won't let me forget it's there!!

today i had my ortho appointment, and i started crying. i pulled my hair back into a ponytail (which i hate doing, as it shows off my long profile) and let this man stare and poke at the part of myself that i've tried to hide my whole life. he told me that i don't need braces; i have "perfect teeth."

i just need surgery.

and just as soon as it had started, my appointment was over. after all, what else was there to discuss? i can't afford surgery, and according to the orthodontist, i have a "slim chance" of getting my insurance company to cover the costs (30,000 dollars plus???). I'm a little confused because our dental insurance is through Aetna, while medical is through Cigna. After looking at both insurance policies regarding orthognathic surgery online, it looks like Aetna offers more flexibility where this type of surgery is concerned. the ortho assistant told me to be a "squeaky wheel", because insurance companies hate people who continue to write and call and cause a fuss.

so all night i've been looking at surgery before and afters, and i can't even count the number of times i've started crying. when i look in the mirror, all i can see is my imperfect face. when my jaw pops and moves out of place and hurts all i can think about is my imperfect face. when i see a person with a beautiful jaw line, all i think of is my imperfect face. when i wear turtlenecks, when i smile, when i wear my hair up, when i'm in a photograph, when i eat, when i talk, when a person looks at me from the side...

all i can think is "hey, jay leno. ha. hah. ha."